Recently, Teresa and I wrote about the beginning of Torn In Half and the lack of resources that were out there when we both lost our husbands. In thinking about that, I decided to go to Facebook and look for widow groups.
My Jaw dropped.
There are now a ton of groups out there with a variety of options. From these, I chose a few to join. Among them, I joined Young and Widowed with Children, Forever After -Widows & Widowers, Widows with Valor (related to Oils), Young Widows & Widowers Support Group. You can find these by searching for widow groups if you would like to join.
My purpose in joining them at this point in my journey was to find out how others were processing their grief as I had and continue to process mine. Granted, I am almost 13 years out. Nonetheless, I did find that there were other widows with a similar timeline to mine that were in these groups. I had found others who understood and were stepping up to express their grief.
What I didn’t expect were the widows who were reaching out just a few hours or days after the death of their spouse. I admire them for having the strength to do so. I can only remember being able to barely breathe at that point. It was three days before I noticed the rocks that had embedded in my hands when I fell beside him. To be able to reach out for assistance….I truly admire these new widows. Even so, I am sad that they have reason to enter these groups.
I also found that the same issues that Teresa and I write about are the same issues that many are going through. The unwanted advice, the lack (or overabundance) of help; the wanting of life to return to what it used to be; unexpectedly parenting without a partner and the myriad of other issues that we all face in our journey. Similar issues but a variety of paths that are followed. Confirmation that, while we all have shared commonalities, our journeys are our own and, yet, only someone walking this path can truly understand and truly get it. We are glad to have each other and, even so, we are upset when someone new enters this group. We wish that we had no new members and we rally around each other to assist when needed.
Another thing I realized was that being in the groups brought up some memories for me. It has enabled me to write more about items that may help others. It is my hope that this will help all of you in your respective journeys.
Teresa and I will continue to write as it is our hope that our words will provide solace to those traveling this journey. We admire your strength and individual journeys and will provide what help we can through our blog. While we will do what we can, we hope that you will seek assistance when needed beyond our scope. Sometimes, you need to ask for help. There are resources for that. Therapy, counseling, coaching and spiritual guides to assist you. Please do seek the help you need.
If there are other resources that you would like us to include in our blog, please let us know and we will do our best to find links or information for those items. We hope that our words and stories bless you on your journeys and that you will share them with others who need it.
Peace & Blessings to all of you.
Jeni
Please comment and share your experiences. If you have resources please share with our community.
